Wednesday, April 25, 2012

#10 eliminate crabs and surround yourself with supportive people



Losing weight and getting healthy does have it's perks.

  • I get to do things that I enjoy now without being out of breath, like going on a walk or a hike.
  • I can sit in the seats at Target Field without having to worry if I will actually fit in them.  This thought used to cross my mind in many situations...church, Valleyfair, MOA rides, seats on airplanes or any place that might have confined seating.  Those of you that have been there know what this feeling is like.
  • One of my neighbors has a nickname for me..."slim".  I laugh at times when I hear it but it is better than being called "fatty".  I think I will stick with "slim".  I've been told that I am half the person that I was before I started getting healthy.  I see the changes in sizes and measurements but at times it can be hard to see a difference in the reflection in the mirror.
  • I get to wear clothes that are smaller than the bags that I was wearing and I don't have to shop at "special" stores.  I still have a lot of the t-shirts from when I was at my heaviest and will put them on when we are painting or doing some messy things and I am swimming in them.  Great feeling.
  • I can shop at regular stores again.  I hated shopping!  Hate is a very strong word but I truly had zero enjoyment from going into a store with the job of finding clothes that fit.  Nothing was big enough and nothing was long enough.  I still have the long problem since I am a bit taller than the average female but that is not as hard to deal with anymore since tall options are getting better.  
  • I know that the foods that I am consuming on a regular basis now are so much better than what I used to eat.  Greasy hamburgers, lots of fried foods, almost zero fruits and pretty much zero veggies (unless it was on that burger)...those were my regulars.  In fact, I can tell you the numbers on the menus of some very famous fast food joints of what my exact order was.  I did have a physical about a year ago, the first in probably 10+ years, and had blood work done.  It will be interesting to see how those numbers have changed when I decide to go in for another physical.  I wonder how many years I have added to my life just by the changes I have made and exercising? 
As I started this journey I read that I will encounter people who will not be happy for my success and will try to sabotage my journey.  I had no idea that this would actually happen with people I know.  I thought people would be happy for me all the time.  Why wouldn't they be?  Why would someone put me down for doing something that I like to do, that I needed to do and I am successful with?  Never thought it would happen.

I can tell you though that this has not been my experience.  I didn't realize who was not happy with me until a few days ago.  It was like a lightbulb went off.  I've been on this journey for at least 2+ years and it has taken me this long to finally see the light.  All the comments.  All the looks.  I thought they were just a reflection of a continuation of bad days for this individual.  I am realizing though that the comments that I am hearing are more of an attack at me doing a good job and sticking with what I want and with what I am accomplishing.  I am hearing excuse after excuse as to why they aren't making changes in their own life and I'm not even asking to hear those.  Asking someone, "How are you doing?" should not have the response, "I'm 20 lbs heavier than I was a year ago."  The excuses are just spilled out along with the criticizing words or the look that I get as I see them.   Sometimes I will even get to hear about a particular body part that they don't like about themselves as they are comparing their body to mine.  Women do that to each other all the time...our society basically tells us to.  Out loud though?  I even get to hear about clothes sizes and how we are similar in some areas and not in others.  My style is basically yoga pants and t-shirts or jeans and t-shirts.  One of my favorite shirts right now is from Goodwill.  Trust me...there is nothing to envy with my style choices.  

Why oh why did it take me so long to see that this person is not a positive person in my life?

#10 on the Fit Female Credo by Rachel Cosgrove...eliminate crabs and surround yourself with supportive people

Unfortunately the battle that is going on is not one that I can fix for this person.  I am going to continue to do what I am doing and work towards the goals that I have for myself.  I can't put goals in place for anyone else.  I can't make someone work at getting healthy and I can't make someone want to change.  Those are all individual choices that every person makes for themselves every single day and with every choice that they make.  I will exhaust myself if I try to have a positive relationship with someone who doesn't want to have a positive relationship with me.  I can't put that want into their mental thoughts.  What I can do is realize that these words and looks are really not about me and to just brush it off and keep moving forward.  

Surrounding myself with supportive people...I am doing that and will continue to do that.  
  • Having a husband that supports the food that I buy at the store (I know you love spinach now!), holds down the fort when I need to get to the gym or run outside, 
  • friends that hold me accountable if I make it to the gym or not, 
  • having people around me who understand what I am doing and why and who I can share my goals and accomplishments with.  
  • Keeping those Negative Nancy's as far away from me as possible.  

I will still be who I am.  
I will always try to be supportive to those that want to make a healthy change in their life.  
I will keep working hard at my goals.
I will keep smiling.
I am a stronger, smarter, tougher and more confident woman because of the changes I have made on this journey.

I will be proud of me!

2 comments:

Michelle Heilskov said...

It's crazy how some people are fine with the failures and struggles of others, but uncomfortable with their successes.
Surround yourself with people who encourage and uplift you!
You are a great example of patience, determination, and PERSEVERENCE!
Great job!

Jessica said...

Thanks.