Oh the joys of living with asthma

Our life just seems to keep on moving.  Schedules are busy as a family of 5 and this is one week where I am feeling the stress of that packed schedule.

Change in our life has led to a few things...

• great opportunities for our kids this past year in groups like Cub Scouts and AHG.  
• watching a start up business start to flourish and help others...aka Narrow Road Coffee.  :)  
• me being able to stay home and work doing day care
• our health...mainly, insurance

I'll be honest.  I had a serious breakdown tonight.  I am still in the recovery phase of this (women...you know what I'm talking about.  It takes us a bit longer to get over things that bother us emotionally).  I am trying to be ok with some change but it is really taking its toll on me tonight.  Sorry Chris for making you late to your meeting!

Why am I so upset today?  It started at about noon.  The kids are all eating lunch and this is actually one of the best times for me to get any phone calls done.  

Almost 3 weeks ago I called our new prescription company that we have to use for our insurance.  I needed some refills and was going to soon be out of medicine.  I called in the refills, thought the process went very smooth and then waited the appropriate amount of 7 to 10 days.  I waited those days, saw my prescription run out and kept waiting.  7 additional days of waiting and I finally called to check and see where my refill was.  No record of anything which means that there is no medication on its way.  The refill was ordered again and I was reassured again that I soon would be back to my normal routine of things to help keep my lungs nice and open.

Phone call comes in around 3pm.  A message is left asking me to call the billing department.  It is a new company so maybe they don't have my billing info.  I had no thoughts of what was about to come though.

"Yes, Mrs. Williams, we are just wanting to get in touch with you before we put this order through because we wanted to make sure you were aware of the amount and were ok with the billing."

Thank goodness I wasn't holding a child or anything breakable because I seriously think that I had a little bit of a heart attack when I heard the words $800.24.  

Excuse me?  What was that total again.

After making calls to the doctor to see if there were generics that I could get instead I thought that I was in the clear for one of my medicines.  The more expensive one has no alternatives at this point.  My heart calmed down a little bit and I didn't feel quite as stressed at that point for the financial burden that I was causing my family.  All those feelings came roaring back though as I paid for a new inhaler at the checkout at the store tonight.  One month...$150 some dollars.  Ouch.  That's one inhaler!  That is supposed to just last 30 days.

I was planning on quitting one of the medicines in October.  I wanted a year without getting bronchitis before I went off but this little spike in cost has prompted me to just start this change now.  If I do get sick then I will know that I will need to go back to the medicine.  For now though I am done with that drug that has no generic available.  

Lots of emotions tonight.  I'm scared.  I'm concerned.  I'm worried.  I'm financially aware of how much my meds are costing us.  

I have been following some women that have been taking a challenge.  One lady has had asthma problems also and has taken different foods out of her diet which seems to have helped with her symptoms.  I already have a lot of the same foods removed from my diet for the most part that she has striked from her eating list but am willing to take the next step and follow this plan to a T.  It won't be easy.  It won't be fun but it may save me lots of money in the long run.  

Earlier today I had a quote come to mind...and then this part of my day started.  Seriously, it was about 5 minutes later that the big dollar signs were flashing in my sight as I was writing down the numbers that I heard over the phone.  I need to reflect though on that quote that I had and remember what I wrote:

"Complaining about something will not provide the change that is desired. Results happen from working hard at making a difference."

My job now is to work hard at listening to my body and following the foods that I should be eating.  I need to take those vitamins, eat healthy foods, pick good foods to fuel my body and disinfect a lot when I see a lot of people sneezing, coughing or having running noses around me.

I am back to normal now and I am ready to see what happens.  No more tears.  Who knows...maybe I will find the cure for asthma.  :)